I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
My legs feel like baby dolphins
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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