so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
