I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
