i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
