There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
