Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
