if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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