I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
