hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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