I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
