Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
