You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Randomize
