Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
