I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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