omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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