just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
