Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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