He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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