My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
