I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
well you can't waste a boner
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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