Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
