i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
