I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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