Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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