i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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