I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize