Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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