wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
