"it" just moved
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize