Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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