I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
