Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
