I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
