new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
