this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
