He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
