i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
