barbara walters just said penis...
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Randomize
