So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
