I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize
