i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
