Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
