my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
