the new term for farting is butt boxing.
this boner is exhausting
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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