so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
