Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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