what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
