you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
