We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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