Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
