So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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