all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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